Two Lost Souls

Why do I feel lost whenever lil’ panda is at her fathers? Why do I feel lost when there’s no man in my life? This week something interesting happened, or maybe I just interpreted it as interesting. I have this very good friend in my life, probably the most decent guy I’ve ever met. I’ve […]

Holiday Blues

We somehow managed to survive this long holiday weekend. It was nice to finally celebrate a proper holiday together, surrounded by family. Cannot believe just last year we celebrated Passover over Zoom due to the pandemic and social distancing. The truth is I’m dying to cry but technically can’t. After the whole breakup drama I […]

Dating A Narcissist

The aim of this post is to help other people who might be dealing with a narcissist partner. I had no idea whatsoever I was dealing with one, until it all ended and then I was finally able to look back at our relationship with objective eyes. A person with narcissistic traits (or narcissistic personality […]

Road

You can say the sun is shining if you really want toI can see the moon and it seems so clearYou can take the road that takes you to the stars nowI can take a road that’ll see me through Realistic Closure As oppose to his virtual one. We finally met, after nearly two months. […]

Breakup Toolkit

I don’t pretend to be ok as if I’ve overcome the breakup and everything is great again, nope. It is a process, but I do feel I made some baby steps towards it. Here’s what helped me. See the bigger picture After a breakup, you get so consumed by it… I’ve ran in my mind […]

Introspection

Truth is I am not doing very well. Way too much communication with him post breakup. While I did get the chance to finally say everything I wanted to say to him, each communication (whether text, call, video call) has taken me backwards, making this process harder than it should be. I am finally able […]

Heartless (?) – Part Three and Last

To be honest, I feel like shit, both mentally and physically. I am, however, coping better than I have in the past week. Here’s a reminder: Part One, Part Two. So he blocked me last Thursday, punishing me for my stupid question. Then, at midnight he texted saying he was still pissed off with me […]

Heartless (?) – Part Two

It’s been a very difficult week and while the pain is still very raw, I am taking baby steps towards overcoming this hardship (read more in Part One). ▪ Last Thursday began like any other day. He texted me in the morning, I asked how he was and he replied tired, sad, lonely. This lockdown […]

Heartless (?) – Part One

Where do I even begin? It’s been a fucking rollercoaster for the past three months. Feels more like a year rather than only three months. The writing was on the wall, but I refused to see it, I was falling for you… First red flag was jealousy and possessiveness. At first, we used to tease […]

Lockdown # 3 >> Chaos

I’ve got no anchor. It’s as if everything is sinking at the same time. Only it’s not, but try tell that to my head. I create chaos even when it’s not organically present. My head has gotten so used to being in a constant mess, that my reactions are on auto-pilot. I can’t find peace. […]